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If I had to describe my position in 4 words, I would say: Head Hat Wearer...What? That's only 3? Thank God, I didn't say accountant. Math never was my strongest subject.
Calvin & Hobbes, plastic lunch boxes, the economy, freeze tag, Uncle Jesse's mullet, Starter jackets (Go Stillers!), pogs, the dial-up internet tone, Rocko's Modern Life, the phrase "da bomb", Michael Jordan, the innocence of childhood, basketball grudge matches vs. Matt Perna, and of course the life changing music that once rocked my soul.
-As a child, I was quite accident prone. So much so that the E.R. nurses and doctors at the local hospital knew me on a first name basis without having to glance at my chart. I am assuming they questioned my parental care, but rest assure my accidents were due to an adventurous spirit and mischievous mindset. Except that one time when my mother tried to convince me that my appendicitis was just a mere stomach ache. Thanks, Mom!
-I do not know how to grow up, but I sure as hell wish I did.
-I am a vegan but have a strange obsession with obnoxious food challenges. Ironically, if I'm not timed on eating a 3 pound pulled-pork po-boy, 1 pound of fries, a side of slaw, and 32 ounce coke, then I am usually the last to finish my meal.
-I was once mistaken for Teddy Geiger and almost rushed to a stage crowded with anxious teenage girls. Who is Teddy Geiger?
-Marvin Gaye and I share the same birthday. He was older and better looking, but I am a much better singer. Find me some karaoke and I'll prove it.
Most likely to drink until I am someone else's problem
"Not all those who wander are lost."
- J.R.R. Tolkien
Andre the Giant. ... huh? Wait, you mean to tell me 7 and 1/2 foot tall, 520 pound men actually exist?! Well, in that case I will go with Dean Moriarty.
Barefoot Shoes. The thought of this obvious oxymoron gives me a migraine.